The Masks We Wear
I live next to West 69th Street, where a Broadway legend started a Halloween tradition in 1971 and the block has kept it going for more than fifty years. Every home goes all out. One even hires people to scale the building on ropes under eerie lighting. On the 31st, the street fills with spectators, […]
The Imposter in the Rehearsal Room
Working actors, exhibited artists, produced writers, creators with real audiences. In my work with creative people, I hear the same private sentence: any minute now, they’re going to figure out I don’t belong here. Another success doesn’t always quiet it. Book the job, and they made a mistake. Get the review, and the critic was […]
Your Body Was Never the Problem
Most of us now carry a device that shows us hundreds of curated bodies a day, then hands us a camera pointed at ourselves. It would be strange if that didn’t mess with us. I hear about it constantly in my office, from actors scrutinized on camera, from content creators whose body literally is the […]
The Post-Show Comedown Is Real
A note for performers, because a lot of you closed yesterday. Today you’re mostly just tired. The flowers are still alive, the group chat is still going, and you figure you’ll sleep it off. Give it until Wednesday. Somewhere in there a heaviness shows up that nobody warned you about, and you’ll probably tell yourself […]
Why Saying No Feels Dangerous
Somewhere along the way, a lot of us learned that other people’s comfort was our job. That disappointing someone was a small emergency. That “no” was a word other people got to use. If you recognize yourself, keep reading. This one’s for you. People-Pleasing Isn’t Kindness The uncomfortable distinction I offer clients is this: kindness […]
Taking Rejection Personally, When It Literally Is Personal
I went to art school before I became a therapist, which means my first real experience with rejection happened in a critique room. You pin your work to the wall, then stand next to it while people talk about it in front of you. The polite fiction is that they’re discussing the piece. Everyone in […]
ADHD Isn’t a Discipline Problem
I work with a lot of creative people, and a good number of them have ADHD. Diagnosed, undiagnosed, or somewhere in the long waiting room in between. The sentence I say most often in those sessions: you don’t have a discipline problem. You have a brain that runs on interest, not importance. Those are different […]
Success: Achieving It, and What It Costs
I’ve spent more than twenty years sitting with people who work hard at what they do. Actors, artists, content creators, teachers. People building lives out of their own effort and talent. And here’s one of the quiet secrets of my profession: a lot of them come to therapy not in spite of their success, but […]
When Envy Gets Cast
You scroll past the announcement. Someone you trained with just booked the role, got the gallery show, and landed the national tour. The feeling that follows isn’t exactly happiness for them, and you know it. That’s envy, and if you work in the arts, you’ve probably felt it more than you’d like to admit. It […]
When Generosity Starts to Feel One-Sided
The Difference Between Helping and Feeling Used Most people want to be there for the people they care about. Offering support, covering a meal, helping someone through a difficult time, or lending money can all be meaningful expressions of connection. Healthy relationships often involve a natural give-and-take that shifts over time. Problems can arise when […]